Chapter 59: Don’t try to be a hero

Chapter 59: Don’t try to be a hero Cass was fighting for his life to not tear into the basket and tear open the books he’d purchased. The reason being, he did not want to get caught with his pants down. What if the first book on top was a BL book and he didn’t have enough time to cover it up and Sir Forsythe flung the door open only to reveal he was reading the nastiest, filthiest thing imaginable in this world while on the way to an orphanage? He did not want that to happen. He hadn’t screened Sir Forsythe on if that was a no no or not! It was a silly worry, but a worry nonetheless, and it plagued him. Almost as much as thoughts of what Vespertine had done to him now that he was alone and didn’t have a Sam to prattle on in his ear. Fuck. He needed to get it out of his head. He really needed to. Everyone kissed. It wasn’t a big deal. So many people did it that it was normal. Girls, guys, everything in between. Why did it matter? So what if Cass hadn’t done it yet? Not a big deal. Really, truly. Everyone must have lips that soft, right? Like, he was pretty sure from his limited experience that Draken also had lips that- Nope. Fuck that. Cass was not going down that route. Shut. It. Down. Cass, you could not let your mind wander like that. Just because both of them were handsome devils didn’t mean shit. They were handsome garbage, and garbage you weren’t even supposed to touch. So what if they both had rock solid bodies, soft lips, and eyes that distracted you? That was...a dime a dozen in this world. You just...hadn’t left the mansion. He was bound to find more handsome garbage elsewhere. He had to. There was no way that Lady Fiona got all of the handsome men who had tantalizing eyes and rock solid bodies. Not a single chance. Those men hurt you Cass. Physically and emotionally and mentally. Are you just going to let them get away with it because they have soft lips and interesting eyes? No! You were going to man up, never forgive them, and keep your hands clean! You were especially never going to forgive them since they hadn’t apologised. And you would not forgive them even if they did! You are a strong man, and you need to be strong for both you, and Lord Blackburn. This wasn’t just your body, hell, it wasn’t even yours, Cass. You could not go about kissing men without Lord Blackburn’s permission! Or anything else! Huffing, his heart racing, Cass felt he might have felt less embarrassed if he had been caught reading a spicy book now. It was worse to have these thoughts about his brother husbands. It didn’t matter anyway. He needed to get out of the mansion, get divorced and put as much distance between them within three months. The bond would only last that long, and that would mean Draken wouldn’t be able to track him. Cass was, of course, going to put in as much work to fix his image in that time as possible, but he was really going to kick it into high gear when he left the mansion. He’d be living amongst the people at that point, and would be more capable of changing his image with daily interactions. The carriage slowed down and Cass grew excited. He hoped that orphanages here were different from orphanages in his time. He really hoped that was the case, and the kids were learning skills that would benefit them in the long run. He’d barely learned how to read before he’d been sent to school in his time, so he hoped it wasn’t the same here. Cass waited nervously for Sir Forsythe to open the door. He heard some strange noises outside, a distant shriek, and the feeling of the horses freaking out. Worry filling him, Cass wondered what was going on outside. It didn’t take long for Sir Forsythe to answer that. "My Lord, there appears to be some monsters about. Remain inside, Sir Sanders and I are going to aid Ser Hune. We’ll be back shortly." Monsters? Around here? So close to the border, and so close to Lady Fiona’s mansion? That was strange. It was also the first time that Cass had heard of such a thing happening. What the fuck was going on? Cass worried nervously, leaning towards the door to push the curtain to the side and see outside. He couldn’t see anything from the left side, and when he looked out on the right side, he saw nothing as well. Frustrated, and worried, Cass sat back. He was supposed to be Lord Blackburn. He was supposed to be able to protect people. He wasn’t supposed to sit back in the carriage and do nothing. This was so damn frustrating! The sound of a child screaming had Cass jerking in his seat and against his better judgement, Cass bolted for the door. He carefully opened it, glancing about to see if that was a fake call, or if that was really a child. It wouldn’t matter anyways if it was fake anyways. It was too close to him, and as it was, the carriage wasn’t currently enchanted beyond the basics. Whatever the hell that meant. The man who sold it told him had told him as much, and Cass had been a little...distracted. Cass held onto the edge of the carriage, looking about anxiously to find the child screaming. While doing so, he took in the area before him. It was a large, cleared area with a small, dirt path that led up to the front doors of a huge, wooden building. It looked like a repurposed church, and Cass could feel himself frown. Why on earth would a building like this exist when Temples didn’t appear to be designed the same way? A small fenced in area to the left of the building appeared to have some outside toys and what looked like a garden. The rest of the space was unused, and forest encroached on all sides. This place looked like people barely came to visit, and Cass could feel his mouth pulling down further. What the fuck was going on? There didn’t even appear to be another house nearby, let alone another business. Another scream, but this time more distinctive. "H-HELP!" Fuck. It was a kid. Cass stepped out of the carriage, glancing around nervously before he moved towards where the sound was coming from. It was from the fenced area, and Cass realised as he approached that the sound was coming from a small, tunnel-like structure. It appeared to be made out of two barrels pushed together and set in some...sand? It would have been cute if Cass hadn’t nearly shat himself coming face to face with a fucking giant, unfriendly wolf. He could see a small, trembling form tucked into the tunnel, and Cass swallowed. He hadn’t caught the attention of the wolf yet, but he knew it wasn’t long. He didn’t think that his pitiful magic was going to be of any help in this situation, and if he called for the others, it might be too late for both him and the kid. Fuck. Fuck! Why couldn’t he control his mage better? Why couldn’t he be like Lord Blackburn? What was holding him back? The reality that this wasn’t his world originally? The kid whimpered and he felt his body shake at the sound that the wolf made. Fuck. Fuck! The wolf began scratching at the barrels, shredding the wood with its claws and Cass clenched his fist. He needed to protect the kid. He wasn’t going to let someone die in front of him, especially not a child. But what could he do? The only thing he’d been able to do was create a handful of water so far! Draken...did say he might have frost powers as well...Could he...do something with that? Fuck. He had to try. Worst case scenario, he failed and got eaten. That couldn’t be as bad as getting crushed by construction, could it? Cass chanted the words quietly to himself, a huge lump sitting in the middle of his chest. It was built on anger, fear, and frustration. He needed to get this right, on the first try. He hadn’t even looked into frost magic before, had only been focusing on the basics. He was the kind of guy who liked to learn everything from the beginning, but he knew that Lord Blackburn was the opposite. So, he was going to mix it up. A little bit of him, and a little bit of Lord Blackburn. Swallowing, wondering why the fuck he was putting himself in danger outside of a strange compulsion to die, Cass felt the water fill his hand and relief almost made his legs crumble. He couldn’t, not yet, and especially as he watched the kid tremble in the barrel. The wolf thing didn’t even need to go around the barrel. It was making fine work of tearing the first one into pieces. The kid had to be terrified. Cass was terrified for him. Steeling himself, Cass glanced down at the pool in his hands and clenched his other hand tightly. Swallowing, he did his best to channel the feeling he’d had when he’d let the frost overtake him before. Sure, it had been basically a magic surge, but he wasn’t going to let a kid get hurt on his watch. He just needed to learn how to control it. Master it. He wasn’t going to let his feelings and thoughts hurt anyone around him this time. Or even threaten it. Cass could feel the temperature around him dip and the pool of water in his hand grew colder and colder. He could see his breath in the air, but he wasn’t shivering. He hoped that this was a good sign. All he needed was enough power to injure the thing, enough to keep the kid safe. "Hey kid!" Cass called, and everything froze. He watched as the kid turned towards him. "Oh the count of three, you’re going to run to the front doors, alright?" Cass kept his tone firm and met the kids gaze for a second before turning his attention back to the wolf thing. It did not like that Cass was talking, and growled. It had paused its attack on the barrel. "Kid? Your response?" Cass asked. "Y-Yes." It was weak. Too weak, but Cass wasn’t going to blame the kid. He was scared shitless too. "Good. Ready?" Cass shifted on his feet, licking his lips as fear and nerves filled him. He had to do enough to distract the wolf thing so the kid could escape. He had to. "One...two...three!" The kid screamed, crawling out of the barrel and the wolf pounced. Cass yelled, pushing a wave of magic and anger towards the creature and was surprised as the water droplets froze and hammered towards the wolf. It didn’t kill it, not in the slightest, but the ice penetrating its skin was enough to pause the creature and cause it to scream in pain. Cass only felt a small sense of victory for a second, before reality hit him. The kid was safe, but what about him? He didn’t have a weapon, and this body was too fucking weak. He wasn’t a fast runner, had never been, and given the size of those paws, it would outrun him in a second. Why the fuck did he think he could do this? Why the hell did he think that he had a damn fucking chance? The growls of the beast before him made a shiver run down his spine and Cass took a tentative step back. He was so, so fucked.