Chapter 87: The Deep-Seated Loathing

"Kiana... let go of me first. Let's talk properly. If anyone sees you like this, it'll cause a misunderstanding. Besides, so much time has passed, your feelings with Raiden Mei should have been confirmed by now. This really isn't appropriate." Xin Yu tried to break free from Kiana's embrace, but before he could even move, he found his body become exceptionally heavy, lacking even the strength to lift a finger. This frightened him enough to immediately try and circulate the cultivation power within his body, intending to enhance himself and distort the surrounding physical laws to forcibly break free. However, he discovered that all his cultivation power lay dormant within him, completely immobile, as if suppressed by some invisible force. "You don't need to struggle. Although your abilities are peculiar, the gap between us is too vast. Right now, if I don't want you to, you won't be able to use the power of space-time to leave here either." "While I can't traverse space-time and change the past and future like you, I can still interfere with time to a certain extent." "...Then why insist on holding me like this?" "Xin Yu... you're just too much of a cheat." "..." "The past me might not have realized what you've done. But before you stands the me who has unified Honkai, who has become the brand new Herrscher of the End... I know what you've done for me." "Xin Yu... I owe you too much. Twice! You lost your life for me twice! And the last time, if I hadn't been able to sense your existence and pull you out from that place, you would have truly died!" Xin Yu was stunned for a moment, then understood that his appearance in this timeline wasn't a coincidence or an accident; it was Kiana from this point in time who had saved him. "It's alright, don't you owe me a life too? We can..." "Why are you so unwilling to care about yourself?" Ah... this... This question completely robbed Xin Yu of his ability to speak. It reminded him that Yae Sakura had once asked him the same thing. Of course, he had asked himself too: Yes, why don't I care about myself? He couldn't answer. He couldn't find the answer. "Xin Yu, if you hadn't appeared, I might still have loved Mei." Hm? No! "Wait a minute! Kiana!" "Xin Yu, you truly are my miracle. The day I met you, I was actually very unlucky. That whole day, nothing went right for me, I encountered all sorts of trouble. Then you appeared before me and even knocked away the fried chicken I bought. I was really about to cry then; I truly felt so unlucky. But now I know... the reason I was so unlucky was because I was meant to meet you." Kiana reached out, gently caressing Xin Yu's cheek. "Xin Yu, you actually didn't wake up this quickly. Before you regained consciousness, when I touched you, I learned many things." "I saw every injury you ever received. I experienced all the pain you ever endured... You still have many things to do after this, don't you? Are you thinking of returning to the time of the Second Honkai Eruption to rewrite history again, to rewrite the ending again... Even if you die, you want to save Sirin, to save everyone who died in the Second Honkai Eruption. And even then, you wouldn't be satisfied; you would continue onward, until you could save even more people." "Your past, those past memories of yours, contain both love and hate for this world... If it's merely to combat the void in your heart, you could act willfully and do anything you desire. You could, because your heart also holds hatred for this world." "I can sense that you dislike me." Kiana looked at Xin Yu. She had done something quite excessive earlier. She actually wanted to know why Xin Yu was so persistent, so obsessed to the point of seeming possessed, sacrificing himself to help others. Thus, Kiana had used the power of her consciousness to invade Xin Yu's mind, to explore the young man's past. Time rewound to an hour ago... "Here... is this his inner world?" Kiana passed through layer after layer of obstacles, arriving directly at the deepest part of Xin Yu's consciousness. She was somewhat taken aback when she opened a door, only to find herself in a familiar place—the completely darkened command room of the Hyperion. But, has he ever been to this place? "To think there would actually be a guest?" A somewhat familiar male voice sounded. Kiana turned her head and saw a man dressed in a white military uniform, wearing a cap with the character "Captain" (舰) written on it, walking over. Xin Yu? No, this person's appearance was much more mature than Xin Yu's, as if he were more than ten years older. "Welcome to the Hyperion... no, forget it, I don't have the qualifications. Welcome, Miss Kaslana, to this discarded remnant." "I am... Xin Yu. Or rather, the Xin Yu of the past." "Don't you want to know Xin Yu's past? Please, look. Please, look at the past of us, people who shouldn't exist..." A holographic screen suddenly appeared, and on it began to play a story titled "Honkai Impact 3rd." Kiana watched her own story play out on the screen. Although there were some discrepancies here and there, by and large, it was correct; it matched the events she had experienced. Especially seeing Teacher Himeko die, especially seeing the Thousand-Person Herrscher, seeing herself become the Herrscher of Flamescion, seeing so, so much. When the story reached its conclusion with her becoming the Herrscher of the End, the image on the screen actually began to slowly rewind, eventually transforming into a mobile phone. "Honkai Impact 3rd... Sigh!" A man's voice slowly sounded. He sighed, then put the phone away. Subsequently, what Kiana saw this time was the "past" of the game called "Honkai Impact 3rd." "Kiana Kaslana, why did you have to come? Why did you have to meddle with me? Wouldn't it be better if I just died? Wouldn't it be better if this Captain, who shouldn't even exist here, just died?" "Look! All you have to do is nothing. All you have to do is calmly accept the death of an outsider like me. After I die, due to the chaotic nature of time, you won't even retain any memories. You'll live a happy and fulfilling life from childhood... You won't have pain, you won't have sorrow. Isn't it good for a stranger to bear it all?" "Or are you saying that you've actually fallen in love with me because I saved you? Hahahaha! Don't kid yourself. You know, even if you do nothing, I will still save. There's no need for such insincere declarations of 'I love you, I like you.'" "If you truly love, then let me ask you: if the history of Honkai is changed, if the story of the Second Honkai Eruption is completely rewritten, you've seen the karma we would bear. That is a rewrite and alteration of all futures; the karmic burden is exceedingly vast. At that time, even if one were to fall into the void, one would be forcibly torn apart by the power of space-time." "So, if you truly love Xin Yu, you shouldn't let him change the history of the Second Honkai Eruption. But then your mother won't come back. You know, he's too kind. He would even change the story of the Babel Tower." "He would let Bronya's mother live, give her a home. He would also let Raiden Mei's mother live again in this world, so that girl no longer loses her kin. Your father wouldn't have to endure the pain of losing his wife, nor the suffering of his daughter's disappearance. You could also rightfully enjoy all happiness. After all, once this is done, no one will remember that such a person ever came to this world." "So, can you truly give up this chance to change the past?" "Kiana Kaslana, do you choose a stranger who shouldn't exist, let him die silently in exchange for everyone's happiness? Or would you rather forsake the chance to change the past, unwilling to let this young man once again bear the price of altering the future?"