Chapter 36: Gospel

Chapter 36: Gospel The silence that stretched between Abigail and Jamal was anything but comfortable as they ate. Abigail kept her head down, focused on cutting a piece of steak, but she felt Jamal’s eyes on her. Again. This had been happening for the past ten minutes. He would steal glances at her when he thought she wasn’t looking, and the moment she lifted her gaze, he would turn away. She told herself she was imagining it. But then, she felt it again— that quiet intensity of his stare like an imprint on her skin. Slowly, she lifted her head, only to catch him in the act. Jamal was watching her. This time, he didn’t look away. Instead, he turned fully toward her, setting his fork down. His voice was casual, but there was something careful about the way he asked, "Have we met before?" Abigail froze and her heart slammed against her ribs, but she forced her expression to stay neutral. Lifting a brow, she signed, [Why do you think that?] Jamal studied her, his brown eyes tracing her face like he was searching for a memory just beyond his reach. "I don’t know. For some reason you just feel... familiar." Abigail’s pulse pounded in her ears. Was the mask not correctly in place? How could he feel that way when she literally looked like a different person? Her fingers curled around her napkin as she quickly signed, [If you don’t remember meeting me, then you probably haven’t.] Jamal exhaled a short breath and leaned back slightly. "Why don’t you ever answer questions directly? What are you hiding?" Abigail frowned. [Leave me alone.] She signed and then focused on her meal, cutting a piece of steak with a little more force than necessary. Jamal, however, wasn’t done. "Why do you always tell me to leave you alone when you’re the one who approached me first?" Abigail paused for a fraction of a second before returning to her meal, pretending not to hear him. Before he could say another word she grabbed her phone, pressed play on her music, and slipped an EarPod back in. She should have known he wouldn’t let things go so easily. Before she could take another bite, Jamal reached across the tray table and— without warning— took her plate. Her head snapped up, eyes flashing with disbelief. She glared at him, signing sharply, [Give it back.] Jamal ignored her. Instead, he picked up her knife and cut her steak into smaller pieces, his movements practiced and effortless. "Eat slowly," he murmured, pushing the plate back toward her. "You’ll get indigestion otherwise." his voice was softer now. Abigail’s breath hitched. Her fingers stayed on her lap, unmoving. She remembered this. He had done this for her before. A lifetime ago. Her hands felt unsteady as she paused the music and then signed. [Do you cut steaks for every woman you meet?] Jamal let out a quiet laugh, his gaze amused. "I have a lot of ladies in my life, and I always try my best to cut their steaks," he said casually. Abigail’s brows shot up, and an immediate scowl crossed her face. So, he had many women now? The thought annoyed her, but then... she smirked when she remembered something. She was his first. He had never been with anyone before her. Jamal noticed the shift in her expression and raised an eyebrow. "What’s that smirk for?" Abigail quickly schooled her features into neutrality. [None of your business.] Jamal shook his head, chuckling as he picked up his fork again. "You’re something else." They ate in silence for a few moments before he spoke again. "So, where are you headed? Westend?" Abigail glanced at him warily. [You ask too many personal questions.] Jamal smirked. "You started it. I have an idea. What if we both ask each other one personal question?" Abigail hesitated, considering it. Then, she signed, [Only two questions each.] Jamal nodded in agreement. "Alright. First question— why are you signing instead of talking?" Abigail hesitated again before finally responding, [It’s complicated. I can’t give you the full details, but for now, let’s just say I’m selectively mute. No one knows apart from my doctors, so I’d appreciate it if you can forget you heard me say anything.] Jamal nodded once, his expression unreadable. "Understood." Abigail exhaled slowly, then signed, [Are you married?] Jamal blinked, surprised that she was still asking him that, then he let out a low chuckle. "No. I’m not." A breath of relief rushed through Abigail’s lungs before she could stop it. Jamal narrowed his eyes slightly. "Why do you look so relieved?" Abigail signed quickly, [Is that your second question?] He frowned, then shook his head. "No. My second question is— why did you want my number?" A small smile tugged at Abigail’s lips. She signed, [Because I like collecting the numbers of every handsome guy I meet. Preferably single guys.] Jamal laughed, a deep, rich sound that made her stomach tighten. "Good answer." Abigail tapped her fingers against the tray table, watching him. [My turn. Why did you learn sign language?] Jamal’s laughter faded, and he let out a slow breath. His voice was quieter when he spoke again. "Because I met a mute girl some years ago. And I wanted to learn... so that if I ever saw her again, I’d be able to communicate with her better." Abigail’s heart stopped. Her hands felt cold. She knew he was talking about her. She had suspected he learned to sign because of her, yet hearing him say it made her feel lightheaded. She forced her fingers to move. [Did you ever see her again?] Jamal shook his head. "No. I didn’t." Then, his lips quirked up. "You’ve asked more than two questions now." Abigail swallowed and quickly turned back to her food. Jamal leaned forward. "What now? Do we keep talking or do something else?" Abigail signed, [I think we have talked enough. I want to focus on my music.] Jamal considered it. "Alright." Abigail reached for her EarPods, but before she could play the music, Jamal plucked one from her ear and put it in his ear. Abigail raised a brow as she watched him tap the play button on the EarPod. A moment later, his brows lifted in surprise when he heard the music she was listening to. ’All I want’ by James Fortune. "Gospel music?" Abigail raised an eyebrow. [You have a problem with it.] Jamal shook his head. "No. I’m just surprised by your music choice. Are you a Christian?" Abigail shrugged. [I like gospel songs. They soothe my spirit. I wouldn’t say I’m a Christian, but I pray sometimes.] Jamal didn’t say anything at first. Then, quietly, he murmured, "I started listening to gospel recently. Someone I admired recommended them," he said, thinking about the podcaster, Nobody, who had talked about her newfound love for gospel songs. She smiled, [That someone must be pretty smart.] Jamal smiled. "She is." [So, what do you think about gospel songs?] She asked, and he smiled. "I mostly enjoy listening to worship songs," he said, and she grinned. [I guess we have something in common, then.] "I guess so. How did you begin to listen to gospel songs?" Jamal asked curiously. Abigail sighed softly, [My doctor friend. She is a Christian. She told me she was sad and bitter for a long time and then somehow she felt better about herself and life when she became a Christian. I heard her listening to a worship song once and I liked the lyrics so I began to listen to them.] "That’s nice," Jamal said, and then he resumed the song and it played as they finished their meal in silence.