Chapter 99: Petals of Petty Vengeance

Words : 1049 Updated : Sep 17th, 2025

Chapter 99: Petals of Petty Vengeance A vast, magical structure filled with rare spiritual flora—each flower more deadly than the last. One bloomed with hallucinations, another whispered your darkest secrets, and one just... exploded if you looked at it funny. Wuheng stood before a glass pedestal holding a single violet rose glowing faintly with cursed qi. "This..." he whispered, "is the Lustblight Widow Petal. It blooms only once every century, and upon touch, it releases an aroma so intoxicating it drives its victim mad with affection... then allergic reaction." He smiled proudly. "Perfect for Hei Long. He’ll be sneezing through his charm for weeks." Behind him, Lin Fan sneezed violently just thinking about it. "P-prince, are you sure it won’t backfire?" "Don’t be silly. This plan is foolproof." The flower exploded. "...I meant the next one." Phase One: Delivery Disguised as a normal bouquet of tournament congratulations, the cursed flower was slipped into a golden wrapping and handed to one of Wuheng’s followers: "You. Deliver this to the Crimson Phoenix Sect camp. Leave it by the meditation platform. Do not inhale. Do not speak. Do not look it in the eye." "It’s... a flower?" "It’s a weaponized masterpiece!" Crimson Phoenix Camp Hei Long wasn’t there. Instead, Lan Yinyin was meditating.The bouquet was left beside her with a note: To the most radiant disciple. Her eyes lit up.She sniffed the bouquet. Bad idea. 10 Minutes Later Lan Yinyin burst into the courtyard of the sect grounds, flower bouquet in hand, cheeks flushed, eyes wild. "WHERE IS HE?!" Bai Luoluo blinked. "Who?" "The one who sent these!! Hei Long!! Hei Long finally admits it!" "Wait, what—?" Lan Yinyin tackled a tree. "This tree smells like him!" Sheng Moxian peeked out of a pavilion. "What’s wrong with her now?" "Hei Long gave her flowers," Bai Luoluo replied grimly. "...He what?" Meanwhile... Hei Long returned from a walk, holding a melon. "Why are there three girls staring at me like they want to either marry me or kill me?" Lin Fan peeked from behind a rock, eyes wide. "Prince! We need to abort!" "Too late!" cried Wuheng from his scrying orb, watching the chaos unfold. "They weren’t supposed to all sniff it!" 30 Minutes Later Lan Yinyin keeps following Hei Long while humming wedding chants. Sheng Moxian is sharpening her blade with purpose. Bai Luoluo began writing a list titled: Hei Long’s Future Wife Test Trials. Lin Fan has broken out in hives from stress. And Hei Long? He’s begun planning to relocate to the mountains. Prince Wuheng’s Palace The prince stared at the final report. Operation Poison Petal — Result: Catastrophic Backfire. Lin Fan sneezed again. "Sir, the girls now love Hei Long even more. It’s like you gifted him... an accidental harem buff." "No... NO! That wasn’t the plan!" He crumpled the next operation scroll. "Fine. Phase Five begins now. We go nuclear..." Operation: Love Leech Lotus. Lin Fan’s face turned pale. "Sir, please. No more flowers." The old man in Lin Fan’s head whispered: "Boy... if you help him again, I’m going to pack my soul up and reincarnate without you." . . . . "So let me get this straight..." Hei Long muttered, trying to loosen his robes. "You, uh... challenged her?" Lin Fan said, avoiding eye contact. "No." "She said you challenged her." "I was picking peaches!" "Well," Lin Fan said, coughing. "Maybe it was metaphorical. Like, picking the peach of her heart or something?" Hei Long stared at him. "You’re a disease." Arena, Center Stage The announcer’s voice boomed: "On the left—our Crimson Phoenix prodigy, wielder of fire and fury—Lan! Yin! YINNNNNNN!" "And on the right... Hei Long! ...He has a name!" Crowds cheered. A few tossed flowers.One man threw his entire sandal. Inside the ring Hei Long bowed.Lan Yinyin did not. She was holding the flower bouquet still. Still sniffing it. "Hei Long..." she murmured, eyes slightly glazed, pupils shaped like hearts. Hei Long blinked. "Um... you okay?" "I dreamed of this moment. You and me. On the battlefield. Our passion igniting the sky." "...You sure you didn’t dream of getting punched?" The referee stepped back. "Begin!" Lan Yinyin charged, flames erupting around her. Hei Long rolled to the side, dodged, leapt, and— "Wait, is she smiling while attacking me!?" "Dance with me, Hei Long!" "THAT’S A SWORD, NOT A DANCE INVITATION!" She launched a flurry of attacks, twirling like a flaming ballerina. Hei Long deflected frantically, muttering curses. "WHY DOES IT SMELL LIKE PERFUME AND DEATH?!" In the audience, Lin Fan munched popcorn nervously. "Prince... I think it’s going worse than last time." Prince Wuheng sat beside him, arms crossed. "It’s worse than the poison flower. She’s now mixing hallucination with swordplay. She thinks this is a honeymoon rehearsal!" Back in the Arena... Lan Yinyin leapt high into the air, her flames forming a swirling heart-shaped phoenix. "I call this move: Burning Bridal Blitz!" "You named it?!" She landed, sword poised, and shouted, "Hei Long! I love you!" The entire arena gasped. Hei Long froze. "This... again...?" She threw down her sword and pulled out... a jade ring box. "Marry me!" Gasps. Applause. One old lady fainted. The referee questioned his career choices. Hei Long raised his hand slowly... only to sidestep the proposal completely. "Wait, wait. Timeout! TIMEOUT! Where did you even get that ring?!" Lan Yinyin fell to one knee. "I forged it... in the flames of my yearning..." "What the hell does that even MEAN!?" Bai Luoluo threw her drink in the air. Sheng Moxian unsheathed her blade and said, "I OBJECT." Prince Wuheng screamed, "GET THAT RING AWAY FROM HIM!" Lin Fan whispered to himself, "She never looked at me like that..." Lan Yinyin lunged forward with the ring. Hei Long—cornered, confused, betrayed by fate—did the only thing he could. He jumped out of the ring. Disqualified. "So let me get this straight," Hei Long groaned, lying in the medical ward. "I got disqualified because someone proposed to me mid-duel?" "Technically," Lin Fan muttered, "you fled the battlefield." "It was a marriage battlefield!" Prince Wuheng paced furiously. "It’s not over. Phase Six is in motion." "What’s that?" "We fake a scandalous love triangle and ruin her feelings." Lin Fan squinted. "With who?" The prince smiled at him. Lin Fan screamed.

Chapter 99: Petals of Petty Vengeance

Comments (0)