Chapter 167 - 167 149 Escort

Words : 1624 Updated : Sep 27th, 2025

Chapter 167 of "How Am I Still Alive?" unveils: 167: Chapter 149: Escort 167: Chapter 149: Escort The big cat is an evil god. Don’t... Continue the story!

167: Chapter 149: Escort 167: Chapter 149: Escort The big cat is an evil god. Don’t be fooled by her seemingly harmless and stupidly cute appearance. She is still an evil god with countless blood debts on her hands. Her current obsession with chasing dramas, cartoons, and comics is just a camouflage to deceive you and let people let their guard down. She knows that it’s hard to deceive you, so she doesn’t rush things. In a few months, or even years, will you lose your vigilance at some point … just once, and you’re done for! Every time the big cat acted cute and dumb in front of him, Lu Ping’an would subconsciously say these things to remind himself to stay vigilant around this “thousand-year-old monster.” However, now…. “Hahaha, pretending to be a cripple! Walk a few steps when you’re fine!” “Was it you who brought the devils here?! Hahaha, so funny! This bald guy is so good!” The noisy clamor from the Secret Realm made Lu Ping’an doubt whether his vigilance over the past few days was misplaced. “…Don’t believe it, don’t take it seriously. It’s all a scam, all a disguise.” Even Lu Ping’an was becoming less and less convinced by his own words. “Little Lu, this sketch is so funny! Your humans do know how to have fun. Can you help me get some more of that bald guy’s programs? Please, consider the help I’ve given you these days!” The big cat’s laughter was filled with genuine joy, but Lu Ping’an had already become immune to her sense of humor. Just a few days ago, she could laugh at political dramas, let alone the genuinely good comedic shows from that era. However, the happier she laughed, the more foolish it made Lu Ping’an seem. “…Your website’s VIP membership is gone.” “What?” “Your pre-ordered 1990-1995 Classic Quyi Crosstalk Collection, I’m canceling it.” “No!!” At moments like these, Lu Ping’an would doubt whether his defenses were misdirected. But he was also sure that his defenses had a purpose. After all, a fierce beast may not have malice toward humans, but it will still eat them. No matter how lovely it appears when it’s caged… you’ll see how “close” it wants to get when you open the cage. At this time, Lu Ping’an actually had something he wanted to ask her. Looking at the “old man” on the car in front of him, he thoughtfully asked: “I mean, why don’t they just abduct those survivors and force their secrets out of them? Even if they’ve been in a secrecy stage all this time, there must be a limit, right?” This was something Lu Ping’an had always been puzzled about. “It’s meaningless. The secrets of official Secret Keepers are protected by a super taboo item. Retired Secret Keepers have an additional layer of protection. You could drain their souls, and they still wouldn’t reveal their secrets if they didn’t want to. Plus…” The big cat, truly deserving of her status as a wanted heretic, casually shared this secret information. “…Even if you tried every trick in the book, bypassed the Secret Keeper contract, and found out something, would you dare to believe it? Plenty of people have already fallen for it.” The big cat sighed deeply with experience, making Lu Ping’an suspect this was her own story. Lu Ping’an nodded thoughtfully, feeling more at ease. Now, they were in a convoy leaving the city. At least four squads were visible in the ten cars in front and behind them. There were at least ten times as many following them secretly and from the shadows. The luxurious lineup of hundreds of professionals showed just how much Special Service Team valued this “fishing law enforcement” operation. At the time, there were only eleven surviving “old men,” but they were actually all near death. Due to various factors, five of them died within a month, leaving only six remaining, one of whom was not in the ancient city. Two important “pivot points” of the five rituals were dispatched in this fishing operation—one went on the provincial highway expressway, and one was on the way to the airship station (airport). Both groups left at the same time, and the fishing operation began simultaneously. It was now 8:50 in the morning, with a light rain. The cars were not driving fast, letting Lu Ping’an, who sat in the passenger seat, sneak some leisure time…but seeing everyone else so focused, he could only chat with the big cat. He actually wanted to sit in the driver’s seat, but he had to wait several years for his driver’s license. “Not necessarily. After obtaining the professional Secret Keeper qualification certificate, you can take the driver’s license test in advance.” Even Damao knew this, making people suspect if she had worked in this field before. “Of course, I worked in it for over a decade. My rank is the superior’s superior’s superior’s of yours. In short, I was once an alien general who cooperated with your human race… ” Damao’s triumphant words left people at a loss for words. By the way, after joining, Lu Ping’an also had a military rank, which was a second lieutenant, and there were extra military salaries. Lu Ping’an chatted casually with Damao, and the atmosphere in the car was quite silent. Xia Qin focused on driving, but every time she saw the slightly raised car logo in front and the twisted left rearview mirror, she couldn’t help but stare fiercely at Lu Ping’an… This was truly a rush, as they hadn’t even finished repairs on the car before putting it to work. In the backseat were Xue En and Hua Xueyi, both sitting quietly, as entertainment was prohibited during the operation. It was obvious that the fighters of Special Service Team Three had all been sent out, and everyone in this car was a combatant. As far as Lu Ping’an knew, Lei Huoren was also here, but someone with his abilities was more suited to act alone. However, three out of the four were newcomers on their first important mission, and the atmosphere was somewhat oppressive, especially as they were working with the silently driving captain. Originally, Lu Ping’an could have made some small talk to ease the tension, but he was currently having too much fun teasing the cat, and thus naturally neglected the situation at hand. “Oh, by the way, Lu Ping’an, I heard you stopped Xiao Lo’s BUFF? Did you find a new favorite?” Eventually, Hua senior sister was the first one who couldn’t hold back and tried to break the silence with a joke. Speaking to me? Lu Ping’an was taken aback. He turned his head, thought for a moment, and casually replied. “Yeah, I’ve been pushing for 2-tier these days, so I needed a share from a professional Gardener for research purposes, and put it on hold.” 2-tier?! You’re pushing for 2-tier right now? It’s only been a few days since you were at 0-tier! “Squeak!” The piercing sound of the brakes was still ringing in their ears. At this moment, even Xia Qin unconsciously glanced at Lu Ping’an. Others looked confused, thinking Lu Ping’an must be joking, but from his calm expression, it seemed like this was a predetermined fact. “…Such a quick rise, aren’t you going to accumulate more progress?” Xue En was the one who understood Lu Ping’an’s abilities the most. He not only witnessed Lu Ping’an’s breakthrough to first-tier but also knew his professional abilities (before the college entrance examination) after their long training sessions. He was the most surprised one, realizing that at that time, Lu Ping’an’s foundation at first-tier was not even solid, so how could he not build it for at least a year or two? “I can’t save any more progress. I already have four first-tier professions, so I must advance.” Lu Ping’an sighed helplessly, the world seemed to be forcing people to keep moving forward. Now, the atmosphere in the car had completely frozen, and the sky was essentially killed by Lu Ping’an’s chatting. Silence persisted for a while, and the rain grew heavier and heavier. It reached a point where they could hardly see the license plate in front of them, but it was just right for the awkward conversation’s weather tactic. “Hehe, such heavy rain. I checked the weather forecast before leaving, and it said it would be sunny. Despite that, I brought umbrellas out of habit. I was afraid one might break, so I brought three, including raincoats and folding umbrellas, which can be shared with you later.” As soon as Xue En opened his mouth, his nature as a perennial unlucky fellow was exposed. Upon hearing this, Lu Ping’an almost covered his ears, and Damao was laughing too happily on the other end… Brother Xue En didn’t tell a joke! Show some compassion, will you?! But suddenly, with another sharp brake, Xia Qin abruptly turned her head. “You said you checked the weather forecast? Today is supposed to be sunny, are you sure?” Xia Qin’s words contained a rare sense of urgency. “Yeah, but I always like to be prepared. It’s just a personal habit.” Xue En was still confused when Xia Qin had already made a phone call back to base. “Help me ask, is it raining at the base? Or is it just our convoy that’s affected by the rain… Damn it! They’re here!” At this moment, Damao had already whispered the answer into Lu Ping’an’s ear. “Ambushes by high-level professional Life system users often start with a sudden heavy downpour in the area…”

Chapter 167 - 167 149 Escort

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