Chapter 77 - 77

Adam went back to his room after he was done eating. Not only was he tired after today's run but he was also a little nervous sitting around in public when there were known threats about. Not that he expected anything to happen but he would much rather air on the side of caution. Once back in his room in The Layover, despite it being the earlier side of the night, he laid down. Though he was not yet ready for bed. So he pulled out his new game he bought from Lune's. Automatron. It was a simple twin stick shooter with an overhead view where a man, who seemed to have infinite ammo, ran around the screen saving lost humans and shooting rogue robots. It was fun. A great time killer. Eventually though Adam grew tired of it and then turned on the radio station he had come to enjoy. The voice of Silver Ray Johnson filled his room for a good while until he eventually called it a night and went to sleep. The next day came and the first thing he did was grab breakfast. He had a second food voucher so he decided to use it today too. No sense letting it rot. A decently hearty meal and a 15 cap purchase of drink later and he was ready to start his day. He had a few objectives for today, he was planning to see if he could find any odd jobs around town, little bits of work that don't require him to put his life in danger for a day's meal would be nice. Besides, in situations like these you never know who might be a useful contact later, getting cozy with the locals could only be a good thing. Besides, there were a ton of people here, there is no doubt if he looked around he would find something to do. He also wanted to know more about the Horsemen. Salvatore truly knew nothing so he would be forced to rely on the various people he has met here until now. Probably Eve was his best bet. In addition he really did need some new armor, so seeing Olivia and finding out what he could do about upgrading his kit was a good use of his time. Not only that he still needed to install the scope to his rifle. However none of this was at the top of his list. There was one thing he had to do before all else today. Check on Deccanus. So Adam made his way to the mall, towards the doctor's office. Perhaps after he checked in on Deccanus he could go to the armor shop since it was in the same area, but that could wait until after. "Oh? You are back." Doctor Yewon said with a bored eye raise as Adam entered. "Yes I am. How is your patient?" "Restless." She said as she put down her magazine on the counter. "I've had to sedate him twice to keep him on the bed, he refuses to let himself heal." She shook her head. "Stubborn ass rude man." She said under her breath. "Come, maybe you can talk some sense into him." She said as she walked over to the door to the backroom. Adam followed and inside Deccanus was sitting up on the bed, staring off into space, seemingly lost in thought. "How are you feeling?" Adam asked softly as he entered the room. "Violated." Deccanus said quietly as he did not meet Adam's gaze. "Legionnaires are not supposed to use drugs, and yet…" He petered off. "If she hadn't then you would have died." Adam asserted. "Perhaps it would have been better to let me die." Deccanus said, a bit more passionate now as he looked at Adam. "What use am I to a world without my Caesar? What purpose do I have when I have no direction? No directive? The touch of the Legion is not felt here and yet the one goal I had found after so many years was taken from me with but a single bullet. I… do not see the purpose in continuing…" He said, almost sounding depressed. Adam was unsure what he was talking about, since there were a lot of personal events mixed in but he was sure that Deccanus seemed to be going through some sort of existential crisis about himself. He saved his life, in a way he was responsible for this situation. He wanted to help if he could. Adam sighed and then took a seat in the chair nearby. "Why were you trying to kill that man? The one you called a ranger?" Deccanus paused, seemingly lost in thought again before he broke his concentration and looked to Adam again. "He represents the greatest threat to Legion sovereignty since the foundation by our mighty Caesar." He returned resolutely. Adam nodded slowly. "So he is an enemy of your country?" Adam said, slowly piercing this together. "Was." Deccanus said, quietly, after a few moments. "The war is long since over." He said, a defeated tone in his voice. "So then why did you try to kill him?" Adam continued. Deccanus held a long pause, either lost in thought or unwilling to answer, but after some time he looked at Adam, seeming to have made up his mind about something. "Do you have time for a story?" He asked a serious tone in his words now. "Sure. I got all the time you need." "Good." Deccanus said as he paused once more. Preparing himself to share the story. "I once was a soldier for a mighty empire called Caesar's Legion. The empire spanned across a vast distance. One could walk for weeks and still be within the touch of Caesar. And that is not even talking about his reach that extended far beyond our borders… but I am getting off topic." He paused, grabbed a canteen from next to him and drank from it before continuing. "As our empire expanded West we were met with a foe, The Bear, the NCR. A foe large enough to challenge our expansion." He paused again, seeming to catch himself. "I shall spare you the details. But suffice it to say many legionnaires died in a great clash between our two nations. A second, final, battle was planned, one over the control of the largest manmade structure the Legion had ever seen, The Hoover Dam. For months the Legion sent reinforcements to prepare for this battle, and a grand camp was formed to wage this war. My leader, Legate Lanius, Caesar's right hand, was also called to this fight. The Monster of the East was summoned to war. However I remained behind, on the eastern front, the Legion had enemies beyond that of the NCR." He paused again touching his chest and shoulder where he was shot gently. "That is when everything began to fall apart." "There were rumors that the Legate had been felled in battle. As impossible as that is. Worse yet, there were rumors that our leader, Caesar, son of Mars, had died due to some medical complication. As if the gods were calling him back into their service. However, with the Legate missing and Caesar gone there was no one left to lead the Legion…" He paused, it seemed this part was getting hard for him to say. "Our empire, Caesar's Legion, fell apart shortly thereafter. Centurions, frumentarii, the remaining praetorians, old tribal leaders, and all manner of others began to vie for the empty throne left behind. A civil war began… And so… I left…" He paused once more this time a look of shame in his eyes as he said this. "The Legion I knew was dead, my leader, missing, the front collapsed, men who I had served with for years turned on each other, and so I chose to leave while my home descended into chaos." He sighed deeply, ashamed of himself. "For years I wandered, earning some caps here and there where I could, trying to find a purpose, a goal. Then, a year ago, I heard tale of a Ranger who had made his way to this area. For I, who had been lost for so long the story reignited my inner fire. I could hear the drums of war, I could feel the blood of mars once more pumping in my veins. And so I chased him down, for over a year I tracked his trail until I finally found him here." He balled his hand into a fist as he looked angry. "I was ready to end him, exact vengeance on him for the wrongs his people committed on mine and yet…" He slammed his fist onto the medical bed he was sitting on. "He ended the fight before it even began!" He shouted a bit. Adam waited patiently for the story to end. Letting Deccanus get out his anger and calm down before finally speaking up, now in a measured, soft tone. "I know what you are feeling." Adam said, almost sad. "I too once served a great country. A country that is now dead. It sometimes feels like… all the things I fought for… were pointless." He said as he looked at his own hand and opened and closed it slowly. "The bombs took everything from me, my home, my friends, my work, my life. But the thing that is sometimes hardest to accept… is that they took my country…" He sighed. "As one soldier to another, the hardest thing you can do when you leave the battlefield is to let go of the war. The images never leave your mind, the sounds of conflict never truly go away, the fear of death never really leaving you when you sleep… But we both have to learn to let go." He said softly, meeting Deccanus' eyes now. "The hate you feel… the hate I feel, towards our enemies… it doesn't matter anymore. But that doesn't mean our experiences were meaningless. We will use those experiences to help others, to do what we can to affect the now. Because, as I've learned since I awoke from that long sleep, is that there are still people here, living, thriving, and whatever happened to me in the past… I can use it to help them today." He paused once more, speaking more assuredly. "I am a soldier, but I am also human, and so long as I am alive I will continue to believe in the same things I fought for so long ago. Maybe my actions nowadays are not as noble, maybe I'm not fighting for a great cause, but I am surviving, and that is enough, because giving up… that's the last thing I'm going to do. I don't plan to lose to the shadows of war, not today, not tomorrow, not ever." He said resolutely. Deccanus let the silence sit in the air for a while, his expression marred by self–hate. He looked off at the wall, still not speaking as the silence continued for many moments more before he finally spoke up again. "I… need some time… to consider what I will do going forward." He said softly. Adam nodded in understanding. "Take all the time you need." Adam stood up and smiled softly. "I will be in Midway for the foreseeable future, if you need me… or just someone to talk to, feel free to reach out. I'll come visit you again." Adam said before he walked over to the door. "Adam." Deccanus said as Adam stopped at the doorknob. "Thank you… for saving my life." He said quietly. Adam turned around and smiled. "You are most welcome, Deccanus."