Chapter 45 - looks scared

Chapter 45: 45 - looks scared 45 ~Lisa’s POV I didn’t know how much time had passed. All I knew was the rhythm of the water rushing from the tap, the feel of the rough brush in my sore hands, and the vegetables lined up in the sink like an endless punishment. I was still washing, still scrubbing. My back ached. My arms felt numb. The skin around my fingers had started to wrinkle and sting from being in water for too long, but I didn’t stop. I couldn’t stop. It was easier to keep scrubbing than to think. Easier to stay bent over the sink than to lift my head and meet their stares, the maids who watched me like I was something foul. Something that didn’t belong. They still whispered about me. They still giggled every time I moved too slowly or winced from the pain. But I blocked it out. I was somewhere else in my head, somewhere quiet, where I didn’t feel this way. Somewhere far from the kitchen, far from the memories, far from them. I was trying to hold on. But then I heard her voice again. "Why are you still here?" I froze. Matilda. I turned my head slowly to see her standing just behind me, arms folded tightly across her chest, her sharp gaze cutting into me like a blade. "I thought by now you’d have finished with the vegetables and moved on to other tasks," she said, her voice filled with irritation. "Or are you just pretending to be busy so you don’t have to work?" "No, ma’am," I said quickly, lowering my gaze. "I’m sorry. I’ll be done soon." She stepped closer, and my stomach twisted. "No. You won’t," she snapped. "It’s too late for that now." I opened my mouth, trying to explain myself, but she didn’t give me the chance. "If you’re not useful in the kitchen, then be useful elsewhere," she said coldly. "Go to the wine cellar. Get the alphas their preferred bottle and take it to them immediately." The words hit me like a slap. To the alphas? I froze, my heart thudding hard in my chest. My hands trembled slightly over the sink, still wet from washing. The memory of that night, heir hands, their voices, the way they forced themselves on me, flooded back so fast I could barely breathe. I stared at Matilda in disbelief. "Please... please don’t make me go there," I whispered, barely able to get the words out. "I’ll finish with the vegetables now. I promise. I’ll do double the work. I’ll clean the whole kitchen if you want. Just... please don’t make me go to them." Matilda’s expression didn’t soften. She rolled her eyes. "What’s wrong with you? You act like you’re the first girl who’s had a rough night in the palace. So what if they touched you? You’re still breathing, aren’t you?" I couldn’t stop the tears from coming. They gathered at the corners of my eyes, hot and heavy. My chest felt tight. My throat burned. "I can’t face them," I whispered. "Not after what they did..." Matilda let out a breath of frustration. "You don’t get to say no. You’re here to serve. If you can’t handle it, then maybe you shouldn’t have come to the palace in the first place." "But I didn’t ask for any of this," I said, my voice shaking now. "I didn’t come here to be abused." She scoffed. "Oh, grow up. You think you’re the only one with a sob story? Everyone here has been through things. This is not a place for little girls who want pity." She pointed toward the storage door near the back. "Get their wine. Now. And wipe your face. You look disgusting." I stood still, trembling. "You heard me," she said, her voice sharper this time. Slowly, I nodded. My hands were still wet. I wiped them quickly on my skirt, not caring how soaked it was, and walked toward the cellar door like I was walking toward my own execution. Each step felt heavier than the last. When I reached the small wooden door, I pulled it open with trembling fingers. The smell of damp stone and aged bottles hit me as I descended the narrow staircase. My knees wobbled, my legs barely holding me up. My thoughts were spinning in every direction. What if they touched me again? What if they laughed at me? What if I cried in front of them? Would they hurt me again? Would they punish me for speaking up? I reached the cellar and searched the shelves for the wine I remembered them preferring. It was hard to focus. My vision was blurry from the tears streaming down my face. My breathing was short and unsteady. I finally found the bottle and clutched it tightly, as though holding it would somehow give me strength. When I climbed the stairs again and stepped back into the kitchen, no one said anything. No one helped. They just stared and smirked as I passed. One of the maids whispered, "She’s going back to her masters." The others giggled. I bit my lip so hard I tasted blood. The palace halls were quiet as I walked toward the wing where the alphas stayed. I prayed with each step that they wouldn’t be there. That maybe they’d left. That maybe someone else could give them the wine instead. But I knew that wasn’t possible. Matilda would make sure it was me. As I reached their door, I paused. My hand hovered near the handle. My heart pounded so loudly it echoed in my ears. I felt like I was going to be sick. I stared at the bottle in my hand, my fingers gripping it so tightly my knuckles turned white. "Just knock," I whispered to myself. But my body wouldn’t move. Memories flashed before my eyes, their faces, the roughness, the way I cried and begged them to stop. The way they didn’t listen. I felt sick. But I knew I had no choice. I raised my fist and knocked softly. No answer. I waited. Then the door creaked open... just a bit...and I heard a voice from inside. "Come in." I wanted to run. Every part of me wanted to turn around and disappear. But my feet moved without my permission, and I stepped inside. Kael was sitting near the window, reading something. Damon and Ramon were lounging by the fireplace, talking quietly, cups of wine already in their hands. They all looked up at the same time. Their eyes landed on me. And just like that, I was back in the nightmare. My body stiffened. My throat closed. I stepped forward slowly and held out the bottle. "Matilda asked me to bring this to you," I said, trying to keep my voice steady. Damon stood up and walked toward me, taking the bottle without saying a word. But his eyes... they lingered. Kael didn’t say anything either. He just kept watching me, his expression unreadable. Then Ramon chuckled under his breath. "She still looks scared," he said softly, almost like it was amusing. Damon poured the wine and stepped back. "You can go," he said. That should have been a relief. But it wasn’t. It still felt like I couldn’t breathe. I nodded, quickly turned, and left the room without another word. My legs carried me faster than I meant to go, and when I was finally far enough away, far enough that no one could hear me, I leaned against the wall and broke down.